Self-care during the holidays
/I’m going to be going to my parents’ place in Miramichi for the holidays, and it’s something I both look forward to and dread. As good as it is to visit my family (as well as all their pets), there are so many things happening that I usually feel overwhelmed and stressed after a few days, and the combination of staying in a small house with four other adults and a general lack of privacy wears me out fairly quickly. When I was younger, the Christmas season was more exciting, but as an adult I just want to get through them as quickly as possible.
Through trial and error, I’ve found a few strategies that help me get through my visits.
Set timeframes for the trip: I like to know specifically how long I’ll be up there and plan accordingly. Because Miramichi’s at least a four hour car ride away from Halifax (we tend to make a few stops on the way, including at Masstown Market), I try to make sure my trip is long enough so I have enough time to relax between the car rides, but not to the point where the comparative smallness of Miramichi starts to suffocate me.
Time alone: I live alone. I like it that way because people wear me out, even if I’m comfortable enough around them to not have to mask my weirdness. Something about being around people for too long makes me feel exposed, and I need to have time to myself in order to function. There’s also a bit of a pressure to be in “visiting mode” when I’m home, when a lot of the time I just want to rest or watch TV. I usually take advantage of when my family is out of the house to recharge, particularly if there’s a church service going on (I don’t go with them).
Time outside of the house: This one’s a little tricky, because I tend to turn into a hermit whenever I stay at my parents’ place, but I do feel a little better whenever I take a break, even if it’s just to grab a burger. I don’t really do a lot of visiting with people when I’m in the city, though; I just assume whoever I know that’s still living there has an overloaded schedule of their own.
Pets: I bring Autumn up from Halifax and spend a lot of time with her, but I have no shortage of animals to spend time with: my parents have two dogs (Maggie and Raven) and two cats (Mikey and Roger), my older sister brings her cat Willow with her from up north, and my younger sister has her two cats (Daffodil and Lucy) that often travel back and forth with her from Fredericton. They get along for the most part (or have learned to ignore each other), but I’m always amazed how happy they are to see me (particularly Daffodil; she recognizes my voice on the phone) even after so long without visiting, and they always seem to know when I need some time with them.
Sleep: When I find myself getting too tired or don’t want to interact with other people in the house, I also take a nap for a little bit. Sometimes I put my earphones in and listen to Spotify to drown out some of the other noise (barking dogs, TVs playing CTV too loud, Christmas music).
How do you survive the holidays? Do you get stressed out or depressed this time of year?
I’m not going to post a new entry next week (Christmas Day); I am, however, thinking of writing a brief holiday e-mail to some of my friends. If you want to be included in the list of recipients, feel free to provide your e-mail below (it will not be shared with anyone).
